I wrote these first words Monday night:
The text came through, “Heading to the birth center”, and my heart leaped for joy and then caught in my throat. My first baby is about to deliver her third baby. My thoughts were such an unruly jumble of a mixture of;
I can’t wait to meet him,
I hope her delivery goes well,
Please, God, keep them safe,
what will he look like,
my third grandchild.
I’m so excited! my third grandchild! I feel a little old and uncertain of this role that continues to expand while my Mama role, while lasting forever, is changing daily. The torch has been passed. My last child was born five years ago. We won’t be having any more babies of our own, but my babies are having babies and I am all in a whirl of joy.
I finally sat down to compose my thoughts, listening to relaxing instrumental music that reminds me to breathe deeply, when Pachabel’s Canon in D begins to play softly. Oh, the memories that song brings. It was my favorite when I was expecting Cate and I listened to it daily. Once she was born, she’d calm instantly whenever it began to play, and the song continued to be a favorite of mine all these years. How fitting that when my mind is so occupied with thoughts of my oldest daughter birthing her newest babe that the song that reminded me to breathe peace plays. So I breathe deeply, holding my heart up to God as an offering. I am so full, and so blessed with the abundant life He has given me. My children are shining lights that fill me with so much joy, and now our family grows.
We are blessed.
Yesterday morning, well after midnight but before the first glimpse of dawn, the text came through: “Guess whose birthday it is!” and a photo of my son-in-law snuggling his precious new child. Seeing that picture of perfect peace, my next immediate thought was for the health of my daughter. “Good”, she said. And all was well.
It’s a little hard right now to balance the two concurrent roles my husband and I have; actively parenting and grandparenting at the same time. Distance makes the balance even harder to maintain. Our Middles and Littles need us at home, and indeed our current twice a week of on site college courses for the Middles prevent us from making any trips right now. But, oh, how we desperately want to meet this new life, and hold the other two girls, and cook for and help our daughter and son-in-law as they adjust to their own new and demanding roles as parents of three.
Since a trip to meet this new little one isn’t in our immediate future, a box shipped with all sorts of love will have to suffice for now: a hand knit sweater (pattern is Little Coffee Bean) , a hand made doll (my first ever Waldorf style doll, not perfect but a joy to make), a found treasure (a silver plated rattle with pleasing chimes), and (not pictured) newborn hats.
So, to Roman Jacob, born at 1:15 am on October 4, 2016, welcome to our family!
Oh, yes, we are blessed, indeed!